Most of us, in America, take the little things in life for granted. For your consideration, I present the restroom. Most of the time, when we deploy, we have what are called “Cadillac’s”. I have no idea where the name came from, but they are defiantly not Cadillac’s. Over here using the toilet, brushing your teeth, showering, shaving, etc, etc, becomes a time consuming chore.
If you work nights, the mid sleep trip to the rest room starts with the dreaded thought of “Oh no! I think I have to pee. I should stop drinking six hours before bed. But, if I do that I will get dehydrated. Maybe I can hold it… nope. Hell, now I have to put on all of my clothes so the uniform Nazis don’t catch me. Where are my piece of junk flip-flops? I hope they don’t break without any apparent reason”.
After you get fully dressed for your pit-stop, you open the door and are greeted by a light that is so bright it must be similar to the light that accompanies God on His journeys. Next you are greeted by a wave of heat. The scorching wave that assaults you is similar to the effect that you get when you open a hot oven door, lean over, and get a full heat wave to the face. So, now you are blinded, cooked, and you still feel like a kid that didn’t have to “go” at the last rest stop on your way to Disneyland. Dance, dance, prance.
As you attempt to gain momentum you are reminded of your woefully inadequate foot attire. The three hundred yard quest to the urinal seems too far to make, and remain in clean britches, but you press on, unsoiled. You finish the job at hand and return to your cool, dark cave, undress, and lay there waiting for the next three to four hours to pass. Sleep, for some unknown reason, has eluded you, again.
What does this have to do with shoes, namely the ones that are pictured? Well, I am glad that you asked. I am tired of having my aforementioned adventures foiled by the flip flops that blow out for no reason. I think that these shoes would alleviate that problem, and also prevent the baby oil on linoleum like effect that water produces on the shower Cadillac's floors.
So get them you say? Well, I have tried that. For whatever reason, the seller can’t seem to figure out how to mail the shoes to me. So now, I have purchased a fifty dollar pair of shoes, that I need, which are eluding my hooves. Oh, the agony of de feet!!!
Although this story is not nearly as bad as I have made it sound, there is a moral to the story: Waking up and having to pee, in the middle of the day, in a place like this, sucks. They say that the little things in life are what make you happy. I just want my shoes. Ok, ok. That is far from all I want, but it sounds better for the story to say that it is.
The End.
If you work nights, the mid sleep trip to the rest room starts with the dreaded thought of “Oh no! I think I have to pee. I should stop drinking six hours before bed. But, if I do that I will get dehydrated. Maybe I can hold it… nope. Hell, now I have to put on all of my clothes so the uniform Nazis don’t catch me. Where are my piece of junk flip-flops? I hope they don’t break without any apparent reason”.
After you get fully dressed for your pit-stop, you open the door and are greeted by a light that is so bright it must be similar to the light that accompanies God on His journeys. Next you are greeted by a wave of heat. The scorching wave that assaults you is similar to the effect that you get when you open a hot oven door, lean over, and get a full heat wave to the face. So, now you are blinded, cooked, and you still feel like a kid that didn’t have to “go” at the last rest stop on your way to Disneyland. Dance, dance, prance.
As you attempt to gain momentum you are reminded of your woefully inadequate foot attire. The three hundred yard quest to the urinal seems too far to make, and remain in clean britches, but you press on, unsoiled. You finish the job at hand and return to your cool, dark cave, undress, and lay there waiting for the next three to four hours to pass. Sleep, for some unknown reason, has eluded you, again.
What does this have to do with shoes, namely the ones that are pictured? Well, I am glad that you asked. I am tired of having my aforementioned adventures foiled by the flip flops that blow out for no reason. I think that these shoes would alleviate that problem, and also prevent the baby oil on linoleum like effect that water produces on the shower Cadillac's floors.
So get them you say? Well, I have tried that. For whatever reason, the seller can’t seem to figure out how to mail the shoes to me. So now, I have purchased a fifty dollar pair of shoes, that I need, which are eluding my hooves. Oh, the agony of de feet!!!
Although this story is not nearly as bad as I have made it sound, there is a moral to the story: Waking up and having to pee, in the middle of the day, in a place like this, sucks. They say that the little things in life are what make you happy. I just want my shoes. Ok, ok. That is far from all I want, but it sounds better for the story to say that it is.
The End.
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